God knows what time the other half got up but for the first time in months if not years, I had the best night’s sleep ever.
I woke up once or twice with twinges in my shoulders and upper arms, but it wasn’t that severe that I had to try and get out of bed and go downstairs to take painkillers.
When I eventually got out of the pit.. as my other half calls it.. even though I was stiff, I did notice a slight improvement.
So downstairs it was, take the daily, blood pressure, anti-inflammatory and antihistamine tablets and then a cup of coffee or two, before I even contemplate having breakfast.
Well after about an hour of being up, I went for the usual bowl of Frosties and with that I took my 20mg of Prednisolone. I ached, but not as much as I had previously ached, before taking the Prednisolone, and by luck it wasn’t long before the Prednisolone began to kick in.
I even managed to wipe down the kitchen cupboards where the dogs had marked them, with mud, due to them rolling in the dirt and then shaking in the kitchen. For a while I felt like a new woman…
Then the downer…. by evening time, I was back to aching, my arms, shoulders, knees, thighs, even my neck was beginning to stiffen up again. But even a few hours relief is better than none.
When you are in agony, no matter how much you try to, you just can’t help getting depressed. You are fed up walking around rattling with all the tablets, you are fed up with the side effects, which are slowly residing now thank god, and you are fed up of having no energy. This PMR strips you of every ounce of stamina you have… and it gets to the point where you just can’t be arsed to do anything.
Everything seems such an effort… and then you feel guilty.. You feel guilty, because your other half is doing the things that you should be doing. I am one lucky woman, my husband understands and has read the leaflet and understands what PMR is and what it does a person, and with knowing that he does all that he can to help me.
But it doesn’t stop me from feeling guilty, especially when I know my hubby works long hours, and has nearly an hour and a half commute before he starts work and then another long commute after he has finished work, which is longer due to rush hour traffic.
And the downside to PMR is this, when you do feel better, you still have to learn how far and how much you can do… because to overdo things doesn’t help you at all, in fact too much exercise can increase the symptoms of PMR.
For those few hours that you get relief, you know you can’t go mad and cram everything into those few hours, because you know for the next couple of days, you will pay the price for it, as your symptoms will intensify and the pain increases.
The heavy stuff, luckily my husband does on a Sunday morning, things like changing the bed and hoovering down the stairs and carrying the hoover upstairs. Then during the week, I just do the light stuff, dusting, running the hoover around downstairs when I feel I can.
You have to, unfortunately, learn how to rely on others and you feel that you are slowly losing your independence. It’s the little things that have such a great impact on you, both mentally and physically. Having PMR makes even the simplest tasks seem a struggle. And the more you have to struggle the more you become down, which leads to the depression. Things like finding that driving is now getting more difficult; going out and sitting too long in the car and then trying to get out and move; having to go to places and feeling so tired that you just want to lay down and sleep for a while and knowing you can’t; going out shopping along with normal daily tasks that people do without any problems..
From all the literature I have read, it seems you have to pace yourself.. and not go too mad when you feel OK… When you suffer with PMR, you also face the prospect of completely changing your lifestyle… what you could do, now becomes what you can’t do.
And this is one change that I am really struggling to come to terms with..